I remember that movie from oh, so long ago....and today is a day when my reality does bite a little....and so did John Brady.
We went this morning for his evaluation with the school board -- it's the evaluation where they determine whether he will need any special accomodations. I am not sure of the function of everyone in the room but I know there was an OT, a Speech Therapist, an Educational Specialist, and some sort of counselor/psychologist there.
But John Brady was not in the mood to perform today. In fact, he was in a pretty rotten mood----he decided he didn't even want to be in the same room with all of us and in trying to keep him in the room the battle began. The short version is that I ended up with a few bites, a few kicks, a few head butts, a busted lip, some broken glasses and a few choice words thrown towards pretty much everyone in the room. But eventually he performed the tasks they required.
I'd like to say the physical battle was the hardest part. But it wasn't. It was the dose of reality. The reality is my child WILL require special accomodations for his education. The reality is that though he is very bright he currently performs below expected for his cognitive abilities. The reality is that the stress of all those people wanting him to perform and not knowing if he could do what they were going to ask of him stressed him out to the point of hiding in a ball under a table. The reality is he's beginning to understand that in those situations everyone in the room IS talking about him as though he weren't there. The reality of it is in the Fall he is going to school that's not in our home and I am heartbroken over explaining that to him. I dont' want him to think we don't want him here with us doing school during the day; I don't want him to think he's going to school because he's been bad; I don't want him feel like he's failed or that I've failed him. But the reality is he probably will think or feel all of those things.
That was my dose of reality today. Reality Bites.
Oh my special friend, I pray at this time for a special word for you, a special fix for you today in your time of reality, but the reality of it is I don't have any other than this. God loves you and your family so much that he gave his life so that you might have all that he wanted you to have and to be all that he needed you to be and you are. You are a very special friend, mom, wife, princess to him. My heart aches for you and John Brady so much. I am so very proud of the stand that you have taken for him and the determination you and Yancey have made to fight for his rights and his education. He will one day understand the sacrifices that you have made for him. I pray that for you and him. God has a plan and a great purpose for John Brady and all that he is having to endure. What an amazing testimony he will one day have to share with the world as will you of the struggles of raising such a special child. Praying for your reality.
ReplyDeleteOh Kristi...I'm so sorry. I know that is so sad for you. I'll be praying for you & for John Brady. Some things are very hard for a mother to walk through. Hang in there sister-girl.
ReplyDeleteKristi, In reading this my heart aches for you. Adam has had issues with his schooling and his abilities, but nothing compared to John Brady. There is nothing I can say to help the situation you are in. I feel the pain you are in cause I know how it is to feel the love for a child that has so much to overcome and knowing that most people don't understand. Keep doing what you are doing............loving him. That is the greatest gift of all. I am here if you need me. All my love. Anne
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